Poet's Obligation
by hellojello1313
Summary: Todd borrows a book of poetry from Mr. Keating and proceededs to discover something unexpected about his roommate and secret love, Neil Perry. It turns out that poets have many more obligations than he thought.


**A/N:** Happy Valentines Day you guys! Have some Anderperry fluff! (Another Anderperry fic will be out tomorrow, so be on the lookout for that.)

Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. All credit for the poem "Poet's Obligation" goes to Pablo Neruda, who will always be one of my favorite poets.

**• • • • • **

He knew it wasn't right. Guys don't like guys. It's just not normal. His heart shouldn't flutter when he sees him, he shouldn't get tongue-tied when he's around him, and he sure as hell shouldn't want to kiss him. Yet Todd felt all of these things, and the worst of it is he felt these things for his roommate. Todd never found himself attracted to anyone. Sure, there was that one girl in the first grade who gave him a kiss underneath the monkey bars on Valentine's Day, but that was the first grade. He was content with not liking anyone. He didn't need that kind of stress in his life. Then, Neil Perry comes along and ruins it. He's funny, outgoing, spontaneous, and devastatingly handsome. Of course, Todd would never say that out loud. He scolded himself for even thinking it. He can't deny the way he feels, though. He loves Neil Perry. It wasn't all that bad at first. He could just dismiss the thoughts or move them to the back of his mind. As the days progressed and he fell even harder for Neil, it became almost impossible for him to even go a minute without thinking of Neil.

Todd groaned to himself as he flipped a page in his book which contained the works of Pablo Neruda, a Chilean poet famous for his romantic—and somewhat erotic—poems.

"Hey Todd," Neil smiled as he walked in the room.

"He-Hey Neil," Todd stammered, looking up from what he was reading.

Neil walked over to Todd and glanced at the book. "Pablo Neruda, interesting choice."

"Yeah, I was looking for something different to read, and Mr. Keating let me borrow it." Todd explained, handing the book to Neil. Their hands touched briefly, and Todd could feel his heart beat slightly faster.

Neil opened the book to a random page and read over it. He smiled and began reading it out loud.

"To whoever is not listening to the sea  
This Friday morning, to whoever is cooped up  
In house or office, factory or woman  
Or street or mine or harsh prison cell;  
To him I come, and, without speaking or looking,  
I arrive and open the door of his prison,  
And a vibration starts up, vague and insistent,  
A great fragment of thunder sets in motion  
The rumble of the planet and the foam,  
The raucous rivers of the ocean flood,  
The star vibrates swiftly in its corona,  
And the sea is beating, dying and continuing.

So, drawn on by my destiny,  
I ceaselessly must listen to and keep  
The sea's lamenting in my awareness,  
I must feel the crash of the hard water  
And gather it up in a perpetual cup  
So that, wherever those in prison may be,  
Wherever they suffer the autumn's castigation,  
I may be there with an errant wave,  
I may move, passing through windows,  
And hearing me, eyes will glance upward  
Saying 'How can I reach the sea?'  
And I shall broadcast, saying nothing,  
The starry echoes of the wave,  
A breaking up of foam and quicksand,  
A rustling of salt withdrawing,  
The grey cry of the sea-birds on the coast.

So, through me, freedom and the sea  
will make their answer to the shuttered heart." He looked at Todd for a reaction.

"Wh-what's that poem called?"

"Poet's Obligation." Neil smiled. "Do you think that's accurate?"

"What?"

"Do you think Pablo Neruda accurately portrayed the obligations of a poet through this poem?"

"Yeah."

"That's not an answer, Todd. You're a poet! Don't you have something to say about it?"

"Well, I think that a poet is supposed to convey feelings to people, too. Then, the reader could experience those feelings and emotions if they never have before."

"Elaborate." Neil requested, sitting next to Todd, who shifted uncomfortably.

"Like happiness or sadness or anger or—"

"Love."

Todd's face flushed red. "Y-Yeah, you're supposed to be able to portray those emotions and feelings so that the person reading can feel them too."

"What if you've never experienced a certain feeling before? How could you portray being in love, for instance, if you've never been in love?" Neil inquired.

"You could try, but it wouldn't be as effective as if you have been." Todd explained.

Neil smiled. "Have you ever been in love?"

"M-Maybe."

"Tell me who."

Todd shook his head. "It's not important."

"C'mon! I'll tell you if you tell me!" Neil exclaimed.

"It's not important." Todd repeated, a little louder than before.

"Bad memories?"

"N-Not exactly."

"Then what's the problem?"

"I don't see why it's any of your business anyway! Just let it go!" Todd raged.

Neil shook his head sadly. "I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because," Neil faltered a bit, looking unsure as to whether he should continue or not, "because I'm in love with you."

Todd's heart seemed to be beating at a mile a minute. Was he dreaming? Was this really happening? Neil Perry, the boy of his dreams, was in love with him. He opened his mouth to speak, but words failed to come out.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. I knew I shouldn't have said anything. Please don't be angry with me, Todd. I just couldn't keep pretending any longer. You needed to know." Neil's eyes were glassy with tears as he choked out his apology. Todd's heart suddenly seemed to stop and shatter into a million pieces. He always hated seeing Neil upset, but being the cause of Neil's sadness was the worst thing he could think of.

"I love you too." Todd finally responded in a whisper. Neil's eyes lit up, and his smile reappeared on his face.

"Can I—would it be okay if kissed you?" Neil asked. Once again, Todd was unable to speak. Instead, he nodded, and Neil leaned in cautiously, slowly closing the space between them. His lips gently pressed against Todd's. Neil applied a bit more pressure to the kiss, and Todd began to kiss him back. Todd felt Neil smiling, and he couldn't help but smile as well. Seconds later, their lips were parted once more, and Todd felt a peculiar wave of bliss come over him.

"What now?" Todd asked rather dreamily.

Neil chuckled. He got up from Todd's bed and walked over to his desk. He dug through one of the drawers to find a blank sheet of paper and a pen. He sauntered back to Todd and handed him the pen and paper. "I believe you have an obligation to attend to."


End file.
